Community service projects are a great way for children to understand and respond to problems in their neighborhoods and beyond.

The right community service experience can help kids become kinder. It can be the start of meaningful relationships. And it can even help kids understand the difference between social justice and charity.

But there are also ways that community service projects, if done haphazardly, can teach kids the wrong messages. We don’t want children to see themselves as heroes swooping into the save the day for poor, helpless people.

Follow these tips to make your child’s volunteer experience one that’s meaningful for them and helpful to your community.

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Eight Tips for Engaging Kids in Community Service Projects

Do connect with your child’s interests and passions.

Your child is much more likely to have a good experience if you follow their lead. Not sure where to start?

Have they ever come home from school or your house of worship talking about a problem that really bothered them? Do they love to share what they have with others? Is your child an animal lover?

You can also use this list of 20 family friendly service projects to brainstorm a community service project your child would enjoy.

If you have more than one child and they have very different interests, pick a project that fits each of them. Explain that you’ll be trying out different projects every week or every month.

Do talk about what it means to be part of a community

Help your child understand that we are all givers sometimes, and we are all receivers sometimes.

Share a time that your family needed help. Perhaps it was when your child was born, and other family and friends brought meals or helped you with errands. Maybe it was a time when someone in your family was sick, or lost their job.

Let your child know that the great thing about being part of a community is that we can support and help each other when one of us is having a hard time.

If you’re a person of faith, talk with your child about what your faith teaches about being part of a community and giving to others.

Related Post: Ways to Help Kids Develop Gratitude

Do check with organizations first to see if they can accommodate children

In my experience, smaller organizations or programs are more likely to be able to accommodate families with younger children.

Many cities have organizations that serve as clearinghouses for different groups that need volunteers. Google the name of your city + the word volunteer to find yours. Some of these umbrella groups have searchable online databases where you can include age requirements.

And remember, there are lots of ways you can do community service projects right from your home base if your kids are young.

Do start a conversation at home first

In the weeks leading up to your volunteer experience, look for several different ways to talk about the issue you’ll be addressing and how it affects people.

Reading children’s books together is a great way to talk about feelings and experiences. This list has excellent books about poverty and hunger.

If your volunteer experience relates to social justice or advocacy, use this list of picture books about human rights and social justice.

If you haven’t already talked about times when your family needed help (or someone else close to you needed support), do that now.

Finally, talk through the steps of what you’ll be doing when you volunteer so that your child knows what to expect. Discuss how your kids might feel (both pleasant and unpleasant feelings) when they volunteer.

Related Post: 10 Multicultural Children’s Books about Generosity

Do leave your camera at home

Be considerate of the feelings of people that you’re engaging in service with, and don’t take pictures. Even if you ask permission, people may feel pressured to say yes because of the power dynamics involved in coming to a homeless shelter, soup kitchen, or food pantry for help.

Leaving your camera in your pocket also helps send a signal to your children that the service you’re doing is about being present with people right now.

Do talk about related justice issues

Make sure your child understands that the charitable community service you’re doing is not enough by itself to solve the problem you’re addressing.

If you’re volunteering at a food pantry, talk about how many people who come there for food are working, but aren’t paid enough to cover all their basic needs. Laws that require employers to pay a living wage is one social justice solution to the problem of hunger.

Point out to your kids the different things that people (maybe even you) are also doing to address this justice issue. Writing letters to elected officials, calling on companies to treat their workers better, and marching in your community are all examples you can use.

Consider engaging in one of these justice or advocacy actions as a family after you finish your volunteer experience. Here are 4 different guides to activism for tweens and teens that can help you take action. 

You can also inspire them with these young activists who are standing up for social jtu ustice.

Don’t use phrases like “the needy” or “the less fortunate”

Always remember that you are talking about people, so use people first language. Instead of saying you’re going to build a wheelchair ramp for “the disabled,” say you’re building it for “people with a disability.”

I’m also not a fan of the phrase “the less fortunate” for two reasons. First, I think it distances us from the people who were seeking to be in relationship with. Secondly, luck or fortune is not the reason that some people are poor and others are not. Injustice is the reason.

Similarly, the phrase “the needy” implies that some people are only receivers (and therefore other people are only givers.)

If your community service projects relates to poverty, you might point out to your child that research has shown low income people actually give a larger share of their money away to others than wealthier people. We can all be generous.

Don’t force your child to participate

If your child is reluctant or seems fearful about joining in your community service project, let them know that you’d at least like them to come and watch as the rest of your family volunteers.

Dig a little deeper to find out the reason your kiddo doesn’t want to take part. Is this a time when it might make more sense to try a related project that you can do at home?

Perhaps your child just isn’t emotionally ready yet for a new experience. (My 6 year old tends to be very cautious about things he’s never done before.)

Forcing your child to volunteer before they’re ready could mean they won’t want to volunteer again for years. But waiting even a month or two could give them the time and space they need to get used to the idea.

Don’t talk only about differences

It’s important to talk about ways that the people you’re helping may have different life experiences than yours. It may have never occured to a young child, for example, that not everyone can walk into the grocery store and buy whatever they want to eat.

But make sure that you also talk about the things you could have in common with the folks you’re (hopefully) going to be building a relationship with.

For example, the woman you visit in the nursing home may love talking about her grandchildren, just like your child loves spending time with her grandma.

Do you do community service projects with the children in your life? Share your tips for a meaningful experience in the comments!