In Raising Antiracist Kids: An age-by-age guide for parents of white children, I often remind readers that kids don’t need to be explicitly taught racist ideas in order to absorb them. They pick them up from all the messages they are exposed to by society. The same is true of poverty.
Children are likely to develop stereotypes about people who are poor unless adults make an active effort to talk to children about poverty using anti-bias, social justice principles.
But figuring out how to have conversations about poverty with kids feels tricky. How do we break down complex issues in ways they can understand?
Kids are likely to experience big feelings as they understand that so many people are being denied their basic needs. How do we help them deal with those feelings?
What does kid-friendly action against poverty that’s rooted in justice, not pity, look like?
Seven tips to help you talk to children about poverty
This post may include affiliate links. If you purchase items through these links, I may earn a small commission at no additional charge to you. You can read my full disclosure policy here.
1. Explore your own biases about people who are poor before you to talk to children about poverty
As this article in Parents magazine points out, children learn most from the things they see us do (or say when we think they’re not listening.) Spend some time noticing your body language and your reactions when you are around people who are homeless or you are in an impoverished neighborhood.
What feelings do you experience when you see people who are poor, or you hear news stories about people who can’t meet their basic needs. Guilt? Anxiety? Shame? Anger? Judgment? Fear? Pity?
What messages about poverty did you learn from family members, teachers, and peers when you were a child? When you made mistakes or bad grades, were you threatened with the idea that you’d be poor as an adult or stuck in an undesirable job? (I hope this goes without saying, but please do not do this with children!)
Related Post: 4 ways social justice parents can teach kids about money
If you are poor now or you have been in the past, do you feel judgment toward yourself or other people who are poor?
Unlearning biases and understanding our feelings is a long process. You don’t have to finish this internal work before you talk to children about poverty, but it’s important to start with yourself.
2. When kids ask why someone is poor or homeless, focus on the system, not the person.
Britt Hawthorne has an excellent post on Instagram with potential ways to respond to a child’s question about why someone is living under a bridge.
All of her answers focus on systemic issues, which help children understand that widespread poverty is a failure of our society, not individual people.
If you live in an urban area, there are probably areas of your city that are rapidly gentrifying. As middle class and wealthy people move into a neighborhood, housing becomes unaffordable for poor people. (A good chapter book for kids ages 8 – 12 that has gentrification as a sub-theme is Dragons in a Bag by Zetta Elliott.)
Domestic violence frequently leads to homelessness for people who are being abused, especially women.
Jobs that don’t pay living wages or offer full-time hours or decent benefits keep families trapped in poverty. So does a lack of jobs in the neighborhoods that need them most. In my own city, I can point out neighborhoods to my child that stopped flourishing when a factory closed down.
3. Notice stereotypes kids may be forming about how class and race intersect
When our younger son was 4 or 5 years old, he thought that all homeless people are Black. (Young kids tend to put people in strict either/or categories and have trouble understanding complexity.)
We had to have many conversations on different days about this. We talked about how our city is majority Black, so most of the homeless people we saw are Black. I reminded him that we’ve also seen homeless people who are white.
I tried to explain how because of racism, Black people are more likely to be poor than white people. Immediately I followed this with discussing how there are Black people who are wealthy, middle class, and poor, so that he wouldn’t assume all Black people he meets are poor. I also told him that across the country, white people make up the biggest group who are homeless.
Related Post: How to talk to kids about race – a guide for white parents
Some of these concepts were hard for him to grasp, so I just kept sprinkling them in as he showed curiosity and concern. Now that he’s ten, he understands these ideas and will even remind me of them as we talk.
If you’ve noticed this tendency with your children or students, consider watching “Rosie’s Story,” found in this post of videos about poverty for children. Rosie is a young white girl who lives in a rural area and struggles with hunger.
4. Shift the language you use when you talk to children about poverty
Trying to change the words we commonly use can feel awkward, but it’s an important step in shifting kids perspectives on poverty (as well as our own beliefs!) The next time you are discussing homelessness, try using the phrase “unhoused people” instead of “homeless people.” Talk about how that phrase points to the fact that as a society, we could house everyone if we worked together on that goal.
Instead of always saying “poor people” or “poor neighborhoods,” try saying “people [or neighborhoods] who’ve been made poor.” Explain that you’re using that language because poverty doesn’t happen by accident. A society that offers jobs that pay low wages and that doesn’t have strong programs in place that help people meet basic needs is always going to have poverty.
Related Post: Do’s and don’ts for community service projects with kids
I also try to avoid using the phrase “less fortunate” to talk about unhoused people and people who’ve been made poor. Social inequality, not luck, leads to people having less than they need..
Please know that shifting our language isn’t about being perfect. It’s about changing our perspectives and wondering with our children about more just ways of living together as communities.
5. Emphasize human rights as you talk with children about poverty
Our society teaches that basic needs like housing, food, and health care have to be earned. Instead, we can teach children that these are human rights. A society isn’t fair if it doesn’t meet all people’s basic needs.
The moving book I Have a Right to Be a Child explores the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child in simple language. Consider reading this book with children and asking if they think that everyone’s rights to the things mentioned in the book are respected in your community. (With older children, you might note that almost every country in the world has ratified the convention, with the notable exception of the United States.)
Kids have also likely heard from other people or media the stereotype that poor people don’t work hard. Talk with children about how all people work, including people who don’t have a job that pays them. Taking care of yourself and others is a form of work. Helping others in your community, and showing them love and care is work. The type of work we do, whether we’re paid for it, or how much we’re paid, does not determine our worth as people.
6. Explore children’s feelings about poverty
Some children may feel fearful of unhoused people, especially if they are experiencing mental illness. Kids also absorb the frequent social message that people who are poor or homeless are dangerous.
Ask the child to tell you more about what they’re noticing that makes them feel scared. Offer accurate information, without shaming kids, as you respond to their concerns.
Let them know a person’s clothes are dirty not because they don’t want to be clean, but because they don’t have a place to wash them or to take a shower.
Share that the constant stress of not having a home makes it hard to stay mentally and physically healthy, but that doesn’t mean someone is dangerous.
Most importantly, model respect and compassion in your interactions with unhoused folks.
Other kids, like my own, may be so saddened by poverty and homelessness that they want to avoid thinking about it.
When my son brings this up, I tell him that I feel sad too, but I also feel angry. It’s really unfair and cruel that people are being forced to go without their basic needs for food, shelter, transportation, and health care. And because I’m angry, I want to do my part to change this unfairness.
7. Offer possibilities for action
As you talk about ways your family or class can take action, talk about the different responsibilities that governments, businesses, community groups, and individuals have to help end poverty.
When you are engaging in charitable efforts, talk about the importance of justice. For example, you might say “we’re donating food to the food pantry for kids and grown-ups who don’t have enough to eat. But what would be more fair is if our country offered Food Stamps to every person who needs them, so that they can pick out exactly the groceries they want to eat. And it would be more fair if the amount of the Food Stamps was enough that people didn’t run out of them by the end of the month, which happens a lot now. It would also be more fair if all businesses paid their workers a living wage.”
Related Post: How to write a family letter elected officials about hunger
You can go even further by asking children if they’d like to join you in calling for fairness. You could write a letter together to your elected officials about food programs, living wages, or affordable housing. (Young kids could just sign their names to your letter and/or add a picture.)
Your family could have a lemonade stand that raises money for social justice groups tackling poverty, like The Poor People’s Campaign or The National Day Labor Organizing Network. Talk about the solutions to poverty that the group is working for, and how they’re rooted in justice.
Resources to help you talk with children about poverty
Children’s books about poverty and hunger
Children’s books about housing and homelessness
Sesame Street in Communities videos featuring Lily, a Muppet who is homeless
Videos that help kids understand poverty
Wheel of privilege and power (This can be a good tool for older children to spark conversations about how poverty and social class intersect with other forms of privilege and oppression.)
SPENT simulation about living with poverty and hunger (for ages 12+)
